How to Create a Meaningful Life After the Military

Finding purpose after the military feels almost impossible, doesn't it? It's not that you don't have skills to translate into civilian work. It's the underlying sense of why you are doing it that feels so off. Once you've been responsible for life and death, millions of dollars worth of equipment, or leading others into and through … Continue reading How to Create a Meaningful Life After the Military

Interview: On Healing, Breaking Isolation, and What It’s Like to Help Veterans

Q: What do you believe plays the biggest role in healing? Grace. The warrior's instinct is to fight, to just be stronger, apply more force. Most of the time on the battlefield this is what works. Most of the time at home, this works. Because these struggles are very real battles; they take place now … Continue reading Interview: On Healing, Breaking Isolation, and What It’s Like to Help Veterans

When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong

It's that heaviness deep in your chest. That gaping void where part of who you were before is permanently gone. It's the sense of having done things that can never be undone, a burden of being responsible for having taken life and for having lost it. A burden you know is yours to carry. It's … Continue reading When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong

On Healing, Spirituality and Warriorhood after Combat

I'm peeling back a layer here to go deeper into some of the issues close to heart. Why? Because the things I discuss with combat veterans are deeply personal, deeply human, and deeply spiritual to warfighters in nature. Not religious. Spiritual. Pretty much every topic I discuss can be tied back to spirit. So, let's … Continue reading On Healing, Spirituality and Warriorhood after Combat

Combat Vets: On Carrying Violence Over into Civilian Life

You were trained to be violent. That's obvious to you, but it's not to civilians. They see veterans who struggle with violence or violent tendencies as someone who has lost control (or never had it) and they fear you. Warfighters and LEOs are the only callings in life where you are trained to use violence … Continue reading Combat Vets: On Carrying Violence Over into Civilian Life

How Much Does True Intimacy Matter?

This is an issue many of you, and especially me, are dealing with. I'm going to flat out tell you right now that I'm just beginning to truly understand the importance of true intimacy... I'm a novice at this, guys. Maybe we all are. God knows how many ancient walls guard my heart....or what it … Continue reading How Much Does True Intimacy Matter?

How to Find Your Purpose After Combat

So much of life after combat is an identity crisis. Yes, there's the emotional, mental and physical pain. The nightmares, rage, insomnia. The grief, the edginess, the isolation. Forced smiles, numbness and lack of connection. But underneath it all, there's something else. There's the questions: why am I still here? Who am I now? Underneath … Continue reading How to Find Your Purpose After Combat

When the Past Feels More Real Than the Present

We spend a lot of time thinking that we need to let go of the past. "Let it go". "Move on." "Leave it behind you." "Try not to think about it." "That's not who you are anymore." These are phrases that are well intentioned and often eventually work for broken hearts, break-ups, job losses, and … Continue reading When the Past Feels More Real Than the Present

When Children are the Victims of War

This is the kind of post that takes a shot of whiskey to write. Only, alcohol gives me migraines, so fuck that. We're gonna talk about something that many of you live with and most of you will never be able to find words for... and that's having witnessed or caused the death of children … Continue reading When Children are the Victims of War