When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong

It's that heaviness deep in your chest. That gaping void where part of who you were before is permanently gone. It's the sense of having done things that can never be undone, a burden of being responsible for having taken life and for having lost it. A burden you know is yours to carry. It's … Continue reading When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong

Suicide: Stop Believing the Lie That No One Cares

One of my Soldiers learned today that he lost a soldier to suicide. One of my Marines attended the funeral this week of a brother who went Home early. I'm sure there are many more of you who are dealing with this kind of loss right now. And many of you who are contemplating killing … Continue reading Suicide: Stop Believing the Lie That No One Cares

Combat PTSD: F***ed Up or Wounded?

Okay, so the words themselves mean the same thing in your mind. Fucked up. Pain. Shit. Issues. Doesn't matter what you call it, right? Who cares? What if how you think of it is keeping you stuck? No, I'm not being "a writer" here and picking on words. On the surface, it doesn't matter how you refer to the … Continue reading Combat PTSD: F***ed Up or Wounded?

I Came Back from Combat, Why the #@!% Am I So Angry!?!?

You come home from combat angry. Stupid shit sets you off. You lash out at people you care about only to see pain and fear flash through their confused eyes. Sometimes you start fights on purpose. Usually, you just react. A stupid driver makes you snap, before you know it you're in a blind rage. In … Continue reading I Came Back from Combat, Why the #@!% Am I So Angry!?!?

When Children are the Victims of War

This is the kind of post that takes a shot of whiskey to write. Only, alcohol gives me migraines, so fuck that. We're gonna talk about something that many of you live with and most of you will never be able to find words for... and that's having witnessed or caused the death of children … Continue reading When Children are the Victims of War

What to Do When You Just Can’t Talk About It

It lines your inside, this presence you've become so familiar with that you're not sure where you end and it begins. It's just... there. Always there. Images. Scents. Sounds. Fear. Memories. Pain. You try to shut it out. It returns. You lock it up inside. It gets out. It wants you to stare into its deceiving eyes. And when you … Continue reading What to Do When You Just Can’t Talk About It

Combat Veterans Ask: Can I Be Forgiven?

First off, let me tell you this: forgiveness is a human issue. Not just a God one. There is ample discussion of forgiveness in religion and many sources to find those discussions. Instead of diving into theological viewpoints, I'm going to bring it all down to one fact: We are all of One Source. One … Continue reading Combat Veterans Ask: Can I Be Forgiven?

On Fallujah’s Fall: Was it Worth It?

The public hears about Fallujah falling back into terrorists' hands and it's a blip on their stream of distraction. They don't give a shit. You hear it and it puts into question the reason why you continue to pay a high price for Iraq 24 hours a day. Why your life is what it is … Continue reading On Fallujah’s Fall: Was it Worth It?