Combat Guilt, Forgiveness and Mercy

It sits in you like a cold stone. Immovable. Heavy. Part of you. Combat guilt. Survivor's guilt. Shame. Failure. Self-loathing. Self-hate. That weary surrender to the belief that you deserve to be punished. Because you know you do. You know it as truth in your soul. Good exists for others. You're grateful and happy for … Continue reading Combat Guilt, Forgiveness and Mercy

When You Don’t Believe Forgiveness Applies to You

I just spoke to a friend, another veteran, and my heart bleeds for the guy.  He is a Vietnam era vet. He put almost 30 years in the Marine corps starting in 1966.  He went on to work for three lettered government agencies. His story is impressive, but not uncommon. His life is the stuff … Continue reading When You Don’t Believe Forgiveness Applies to You

16 Years & They Still Don’t F***ing Get It

I am angry tonight. Angry at the lack of understanding that returning warriors have faced for millennia and I still must face in the broken hearts of those who have been fighting our goddamn wars for more than 16 years now....and still they come home to blatant insensitivity. Angry that any heart could not stretch … Continue reading 16 Years & They Still Don’t F***ing Get It

Coping with the News Cycle

Another day another screaming interview with someone who wants to roll back a few rights to increase their perception (sic) of safety.  It is tough to hear these opinions isn’t it?  Every time I hear one of these people scream about how my rights are killing, hurting, insulting, offending, etc. them it starts a cycle … Continue reading Coping with the News Cycle

After Combat, When is Love Worth Fighting For?

"But I love my wife. She's everything to me. I don't want to lose her." "He's not the man I married. I can't do this anymore." I hear these two expressions all the time from good people whose hearts are aching and weary. Brave people who are dealing with intense trauma and changes in each … Continue reading After Combat, When is Love Worth Fighting For?