It all adds up. Accumulates. Pain, trauma, losses. Anger, resentment, guilt. Buries You underneath. You watch your Self vanish, become unrecognizable. And wonder if you're too far gone to be saved. Is there such a thing as too far gone to be saved? You're tired and it never seems to get better. Your life is … Continue reading Too Far Gone to Be Saved?
The Tent Where Warriors Dwell
It's a dark, calm night deep in the forest. Tucked away in these woods is a spacious tent -- tall and wide with wards running off in multiple directions. Cots line these wards as warriors sleep under the watchful guard of Light Beings who grace the aisles. In their presence, a deep peace settles as … Continue reading The Tent Where Warriors Dwell
How to Create a Meaningful Life After the Military
Finding purpose after the military feels almost impossible, doesn't it? It's not that you don't have skills to translate into civilian work. It's the underlying sense of why you are doing it that feels so off. Once you've been responsible for life and death, millions of dollars worth of equipment, or leading others into and through … Continue reading How to Create a Meaningful Life After the Military
On September 11
A solemn day. As we remember what was taken, what was offered up and sacrificed, what was given freely, what was left on the battlefield, what was brought home. What is still...ongoing. You were born for this day. Men and women called to the brotherhood, called to rise up and respond with violence so the … Continue reading On September 11
Interview: On Healing, Breaking Isolation, and What It’s Like to Help Veterans
Q: What do you believe plays the biggest role in healing? Grace. The warrior's instinct is to fight, to just be stronger, apply more force. Most of the time on the battlefield this is what works. Most of the time at home, this works. Because these struggles are very real battles; they take place now … Continue reading Interview: On Healing, Breaking Isolation, and What It’s Like to Help Veterans
How to Keep Going
How do you keep going when the battles are drawn out, each day feels pointless, and you are so, so tired? When the darkness feels never-ending and nothing seems to get better? How do you keep picking yourself up off the ground, and talk yourself out of fear and back into battle? How do you … Continue reading How to Keep Going
When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong
It's that heaviness deep in your chest. That gaping void where part of who you were before is permanently gone. It's the sense of having done things that can never be undone, a burden of being responsible for having taken life and for having lost it. A burden you know is yours to carry. It's … Continue reading When You Feel As If You Don’t Belong
On Healing, Spirituality and Warriorhood after Combat
I'm peeling back a layer here to go deeper into some of the issues close to heart. Why? Because the things I discuss with combat veterans are deeply personal, deeply human, and deeply spiritual to warfighters in nature. Not religious. Spiritual. Pretty much every topic I discuss can be tied back to spirit. So, let's … Continue reading On Healing, Spirituality and Warriorhood after Combat
Combat Vets: On Carrying Violence Over into Civilian Life
You were trained to be violent. That's obvious to you, but it's not to civilians. They see veterans who struggle with violence or violent tendencies as someone who has lost control (or never had it) and they fear you. Warfighters and LEOs are the only callings in life where you are trained to use violence … Continue reading Combat Vets: On Carrying Violence Over into Civilian Life
How Much Does True Intimacy Matter?
This is an issue many of you, and especially me, are dealing with. I'm going to flat out tell you right now that I'm just beginning to truly understand the importance of true intimacy... I'm a novice at this, guys. Maybe we all are. God knows how many ancient walls guard my heart....or what it … Continue reading How Much Does True Intimacy Matter?
When You Miss War
You miss warfighting. Miss war, miss your team, miss having life and death within your power. Miss the cohesion, the shared misery, the trust. Life was simple, fucking hard, and combat required all of you. Now nothing requires all of you. Warfighting is a spiritual calling, which means that tug on your soul doesn't go away just because … Continue reading When You Miss War
Suicide: Stop Believing the Lie That No One Cares
One of my Soldiers learned today that he lost a soldier to suicide. One of my Marines attended the funeral this week of a brother who went Home early. I'm sure there are many more of you who are dealing with this kind of loss right now. And many of you who are contemplating killing … Continue reading Suicide: Stop Believing the Lie That No One Cares